The Cycle of a Relationship




Have you ever realized the cycle of a relationship? Wait, did you even realize that

relationships are a cycle? Its funny isn’t it? You meet someone, you’re scared of

opening yourself him to him/her; you finally tear down your walls and allow that person.

Your trust and confidence grow and even though you doubt yourself, you decide to

go against your instinct and show full-blown love to your partner.

You’ve been through the late night calls, the early morning messages; you’ve lost hours

of sleep just to talk to the significant other. The willingness to drop any and everything

you are doing to be by their side. The time spent telling jokes, laughing, eating, and

meeting friends and family.

It may not be obvious the first few times but things begin to change, we received signs to

leave but we refuse to acknowledge receipt and act accordingly. Let me state an

example: you and partner are accustomed to speaking five (5) times over the phone

everyday as the days turn into weeks, then months then years, communication regresses

to three (3) times for the day, then it reaches a point where you guys no longer speak. It

is now at a level where you have nothing interesting to speak about or whatever your

partner says is disrespectful, obnoxious and the list will never end.

You open up yourself to someone who will eventually become a stranger. Sooner or

later, the same person you are so in love with today, you will walk pass on the streets and

not recognize them. Whether you remember the memories and joys shared is solely

dependent on each relationship, regardless, does it make sense to keep trying, keep doing

the same thing over and over?

It is a known fact that continuously repeating a failed action to receive a successful result

is insane. It doesn’t make sense, so what are some things you can do to ensure that the

next relationship you are involved in will be successful.

Here are some factors you can consider before entering a relationship:

  1. Stay true to yourself! Even though it’s extremely difficult to be you when it

comes on to people and relationships, it will reap rich rewards at the end of the

day. Afterall, who else can you be?

  1. Never allow your past to affect your future. No two person are the same, your

ex may have some excellent qualities that you loved and admired but don’t expect

your future partner to have the same qualities.

  1. Have high, but realistic expectations of your partner. It is not infeasible to

expect your partner to bring you out on a date or open the doors for you.

However, do not be impractical. If you both decide to build a house, save for a

car, or have kids, money is needed. Do not expect your partner to bring you out

on a date has regularly has they would if you both are saving towards a common


  1. Share the burden. So many women believe that the man is the only one

expected to do the “spoiling.” I am a firm believer that everything should be

50/50; if you have a partner that you love, as the woman, you can bring him out

for dinner at a fancy restaurant and pick up the bill. Take him shopping at his

favorite store, surprise him while at work with lunch or breakfast, send him a

detailed and heartfelt message, expressing how much you love and appreciate him

for everything he has done for you and that you are proud of the person he is

becoming. Believe me, men love that.

  1. Be someone your partner can run to not run away from. Listen to your

partner; allow them to feel a sense of release when they are with you. Rub their

back, feet or head while they are expressing to you what happened throughout

their day. Be a source of comfort not pain.

  1. Never build your relationship on sex, build it on trust, love, communication

and respect. Trust your partner enough to believe that he/she first before

believing the slander that follows. Love them with all your heart because times

will come when you will question yourself and your partner. Communication is

vital in every relationship, without it, no action you are taking would be necessary

and respect your partner; treat your partner how you’d treat yourself or how you

would like to be treated.

Now that I have stated at six actions that could jump start a new and strong

relationship what are your ideas?


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